


Lecter

by edgeinlampshade



Category: Hannibal Lecter (Hopkins Movies), Hannibal Lecter Tetralogy - Thomas Harris, silence of lambs
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-04-13
Packaged: 2020-01-05 01:19:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 12,370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18355661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/edgeinlampshade/pseuds/edgeinlampshade





	1. Chapter 1

-Stewardess please prepare for landing-

 

My eyes flew open as I felt the jolt of the wheels hitting the ground.  
-Welcome to Baltimore! Home of the Ravens. This flight's bags will be at carousel 3. Have a great day-  
The seat belt sign dinged, making me jump slightly. Wave of icy fear washing over me as I realized that I truly was far from home. A good 3,000 miles away from my hometown in California. I wonder if I've made a mistake...

*My studio apartment - downtown Baltimore*

Setting my bags down in the doorway kicking them into my one bedroom studio apartment. Before I get too comfortable I should probably call my parents, before they start to worry...

"Mom? Yeah I'm here, in the apartment. Flight was fine...long, boring. Yeah I slept most of the way so that was a plus... Listen I'm exhausted I'll give you a call later, okay?" *Click* Now I can finally lay down.

 

*Baltimore State Hospital*  
Baltimore, Maryland

 

I traveled halfway across the country for a mid level low paying nursing job at the Baltimore State Hospital. The overwhelming anxiety has a massive choke hold on me, sitting in my new Buick. Not sure if it's just because it's my first day out at this job or because I had literally just moved to a completely new state a week ago. I took a week to acclimate to the town, find a nearby grocery store and a diner within walking distance of my place. Still did feel quite right but this is what I asked for, I have to stick with it.  
I gathered my nerves and went to the front office to sign in, I got a name tag along with a security card. The secretary asked me to wait for the head of the facility in his office. Sitting in the little wooden chair, shifting uncomfortably; becoming overly aware how my body felt in this androgynous scrub cut. I wore my hair down, distracting from the fact my nursing scrub gave me absolutely no feminine figure... Not that it would matter in a mental hospital.  
"Ms. Stone is it?" I stood and shook his hand confidently like I had seen my dad do many times. "I'm doctor Chiltion, I'm in charge of this facility but I'm sure you already knew that". I nod, silently begging for him to just put me to work... Something about him just gave me the creeps.  
"So you're new in town... I'll see if my schedule is clear but I would love to show you around, see the sights. It's quite a fun town with the right guide". I get the feeling there is no schedule to clear, that he is ready for any woman who even just throws him a glance. It's my first day and I already feel painfully awkward... I nod once more with a forced smile.  
"You'll be on an alternating schedule for a few months until things are squared away. Your duties will be administering medications and helping clean out the patient's cells at the end of the week. Once we can get you permanently on the night shift you'll be on duty in case of a medical emergency. Barney will go over the procedures with you and you'll shadow him for a bit".  
"Thank you Doctor" I answer as he shows me down the hall. I already see a man waiting, man with a nice smile and white scrubs.  
"You must be Barney" I say a little too loudly, sticking out my hand and giving him a firm shake.  
"Ms. Stone right?"  
"Charlotte works just fine".  
"Each patient has different rules that we have to abide by, for safety reasons of course. Most of them are on the quiet side and won't give you much trouble. You've...read the papers right?" I slowly nod, following him to the maximum security door. I had read all about the infamous Hannibal the Cannibal... A part of me was hoping it was an elaborate hoax cooked up by a journalist. I knew it was real though... And he was here, right down the hall. A detail that was neglected when I was offered the job... Hmm I wonder.  
"There's an FBI agent with the doctor right now so we'll have to clear his room after lunch. For now I'll show you where all the supplies are and then we'll go to this great sushi place down the street". I familiarized myself with the medicine cabinet and the first aid while Barney gave the first patient his medication in a pudding cup.  
At lunch Barney showed me what had happened to the last nurse they had. He thought it best I found out now so I could be as cautious as possible. She lived... Thank goodness but the damage to her face was so extensive. The photo of her mangled face taunted me, how I was lied to about why this position had been unfilled for so long.  
We left, me having barley touched my sushi. When we arrived back at the hospital a very frazzled brunette walked quickly past me, holding her had to her face.  
"Agent Starling?" Barney called after her. "Looks like Multiple Miggs got to her..." Shaking his head while reviewing the security tape. All you can see is flashes but it was obvious what had happened. "We ought to clean that up before there's a riot..."  
When we entered the patient hallway it was complete chaos of screams all reacting to what had just happened. Some yelled directly at him and others yelled just for the sake of yelling. The man they called "Multiple Miggs" was dragged from his cell in a tight straight jacket, laughing about the look on her face when he flung his load at her. He was given a sedative and taken to solitary while we cleaned a days worth of self pleasuring. His bed sheets almost soaked from multiple ejaculations, the scent alone makes me nauseous. Barney went one cell over to help the patient into his straight jacket and muzzle, I can't believe I ever just said that word in my head...muzzle, like something a rabid dog would wear. What kind of monster was behind this wall? I knew very little about the man behind the crimes, a part of me wished I knew why he did what he did. What drove him to it. Maybe he's just batshit crazy...  
"We're ready for you" Barney calls out. I step through the awkwardly built bullet proof glass door frame. Come on, you can do this...  
"Good afternoon, Doctor. My name is Miss Stone but you can call me Charlotte if you would prefer". I looked directly at his glowing maroon eyes. I had never in my life seen eyes such as his. His mask left little to the imagination but still muffled anything he might have said but, he remained silent. Not sure if that's a good sign.  
I walked to his desk where a good sized stack of drawings sat. I looked over for permission to begin.  
"Would it be alright if I moved these? I promise to put them back where I found them. I just would like to clean the dust from behind the desk". A nod and more silence. Alright so far im not dead, this is good - I think to myself deciding to begin straightening up; not that it really needed much work done, he kept his space in almost perfect condition. After doing a quick inspection under the mattress and other obvious hiding spaces I let Barney know I was finished. Before walking out I looked at him one last time, damn near impossible to read... I noticed some hair out of place, possibly from being strapped to the upright gurney. Without thinking I brushed the hair back from over his left eye and moved onto the cell across the way.


	2. Night shift

After my first day I didn't have to go back in for a few days, I really didn't like having such a sporadic schedule but hopefully I can be placed in a more permanent shift soon. As I came in to work my second day the secretary informed me that Doctor Chilton requested to see me in his office before my shift.  
I sat and waited while he finished a phone call, apparently trying to buy tickets to some show. Once he hung up I knew I had fucked up already...  
"Are you suicidal?" He asked with a dead serious expression etched in his face.  
"No sir I-"  
"-don't speak. Was Barney not clear enough on the rules? Maybe you need to take another look at nurse Robert's photo, hm? Do you want to end up like her?" This is when he began to raise his voice, standing up bracing his hands on the desk.  
"You know, his heart beat didn't even go up above 80... Not even when he ate her tongue. He will not hesitate, his only instinct is to do what he feels is necessary to ensure his survival. Don't ever, ever touch him again. Do you understand me?" I nodded slowly, I never know what to say when someone yells at me. I feel like I could cry but at the same time I also feel... Angry.  
"I'm sorry sir it'll never happen again..."  
"Starting today you'll be working the night shift, you won't have to enter any of the patient's cells unless it's an emergency. Even then you'll have backup. Let Barney know and then go home, you start at 5pm". He sat back down, shooing me away with his hand while dialing a phone number. I went down to the maximum security office and caught Barney before he went inside.  
"Barney... Doctor Chilton has moved me to the night shift, on account of what I did the other day. I'm... I'm really sorry if my actions got you into any trouble". He stood with the door slightly open, ready to hand out the medications for the morning.  
"Not at all, I'm sorry I won't be seeing you as often anymore. Maybe when things calm down with the FBI coming to visit he'll reinstate you in the day shift".  
"Thank you, I appreciate it. I'll see you".

 

*Night shift*

The hospital seems even more eerie as the sun goes down... Visiting hours have just closed and the only cars still parked here belong to me, the security guard and one other nurse.  
I checked in, got my new security badge and walked down that long hallway. Once there I had to figure out for myself what it was I was supposed to do, external bed checks at lights out and another around 2am. I sat in the small office and watched the security camera, no movement whatsoever. I checked my watch, fuck it's only 5:30... Lights out are at 9. With nearly four hours to kill I decided sweeping was a good way to fill up that gap. Walked up and down trying to keep my eyes down to the floor, refusing to make eye contact with anyone until I heard someone say: "I see someone was demoted".  
Hannibal Lecter's cell was dimly lit but I could still see the outline of his figure sitting on his bed with his back against the wall.  
"You could say that". I answered back to the darkness, continuing to sweep aimlessly.  
"Now, I'm curious; why did you do such a foolish thing?" I stopped, turning around to face his cell.   
"Don't lie or I'll know".  
"Alright then", I answered leaning on my broom, "if it had been me, it would have drove me nuts not being able to fix it myself. Feels like a bug climbing up your arm but you're powerless to stop it. Or maybe because I'm a decent person, who knows. It's anyone's guess".  
"Perhaps you wanted to see if I was real, you wouldn't be the first. Now...your accent, I assume you didn't grow up here in Maryland" I could hear him stand up, the bed squeaked softly as he rose and came closer to the light.  
Tell him nothing personal doctor Chilton's words echoed in my head.  
"You're right, I'm not". I stop there, thinking I could weasel my way out of sharing details about my life. I go back to sweeping, as I make my way to Migg's cell I notice it is completely bare and he is no where to be found.  
"Where's Miggs?" I ask out loud to no one in particular.  
"He removed his foul existence from this world" Hannibal hisses. I backed away and walked quickly back to the office realizing what a true mistake I had made...  
9pm came to a crawl, i announced lights out. The main lights dimmed until they were completely off. Walking slowly with my softly lit flash light, keeping it low as to not disturb the patients. Once I reached the end of the line I turned on my heel to quickly go back before having to make eye contact with Doctor Lecter. But before I could make a clean get away he called out my name.  
"Why in such a hurry Ms. Matthews? Afraid of something are we?"  
"Not at all". That was true, I wasn't afraid. Not of him, safely tucked behind a thick glass.  
"Then please, indulge me. You didn't quite answer my question".  
"What question?"  
"Where you were from". Nothing personal... Nothing personal...  
"I'm from California, I moved here a few weeks ago". I turned off the flashlight hoping he didn't see the guilt in my eyes, why did I tell him that? I began to try and reassure myself that it wasn't something he could use to hurt me, how naive I really am...  
"Quite a long way from home. Especially for someone so young..."  
"I needed a fresh start".  
"From what I may ask? Perhaps a boy broke your heart or... Maybe an attempt to be free of your parents. Stop me if I'm getting close".  
"Yes, I did move so I could be more independent. I saw the job opening online and I just went for it".  
"You don't strike me as an impulsive person. Reckless perhaps, stupid maybe but not impulsive. What my dear made you want to be so impulsive?" His words stung, I tried to hide it; knowing not to show my cards to a man who could see right through me. "Perhaps that will be a question for another time. For now I would like to know how long ago it was when you tried to kill yourself?" I felt the blood drain from my face, standing there shocked with my mouth open like a big mouth bass. I didn't know what to say, how could he know. No one knew.  
"I should get back to work, sleep well Doctor" I answer as I walk away. For the rest of my shift I sat in the office holding my head, how could he have known? He's a psychiatrist, he sees things others don't even notice. I felt vulnerable and sick to my stomach like all my dirty laundry was hanging out to dry for all to see. When the last bed check rolled around I asked the other nurse to take over while I took my fifteen minute break. I wasn't ready to go back out there.  
At the end of my shift I decided I wouldn't be bullied, I wouldn't be pushed around. I was here to stay and wouldn't allow myself to be afraid of what some nut job had to say to me. I marched down the hall to his cell.  
"Back again I see?" He says from the dark.  
"There's nothing you could say that could fuck with my head. Your observations are correct, but you already knew that. It was when I was 19, I'm not ashamed of it. That's all I have to say" I say confidently.  
"Hearing the truth isn't always pleasant but I do apologize if I offended you. 19 is awful young to want to die".  
"Yes, it is. I should be going, my shift is over".  
"Goodnight little one" he said almost warmly.

I tossed and turned all morning thinking about what I had said... I felt sick. Was it because someone knew about what I had done? Or because HE knew? I'm sure I had just made myself look pathetic. Lucky me the humiliation would start all over again, I don't know if I could ever get used to sleeping during the day, should really call my parents.  
Unable to rest I take a long shower and take a walk around the block, ending up at the Baltimore opera house. There's a flier for upcoming auditions; pit crew on Thursdays for the next few weeks, dancers and singers on Fridays. I always have been in the pit orchestras, under the stage away from the praise and glory of the audience. I longed to be the one on that stage but I never had a chance to be. Well... Better get going, got work again in a few hours.


	3. Phantom of the insane asylum

**Weeks later**

 

Nights in the hospital are mostly quiet, every once and awhile someone gets out of hand. I would spend those nights transposing by candle light, leaning against the far cell wall where I could still see into the cells but be well concealed.  
"Perhaps the lighting would be better in the office" a voice buzzed from the doctor's cell.  
I stopped writing for a moment, setting my manuscript down as I stand up. Quietly coming closer.  
"I'm sorry doctor, I hope I wasn't disturbing you" I answer softly, blowing out my candle. The lights in the hall are still dim, barely enough light to see inside the cell.  
"Not at all. May I ask what you're doing?"  
"I... I'm transposing a score".  
"May I?" I checked my stack of paper for anything sharp, even a staple could be deadly in his hands. I drop the stack into the slot and send it in. I could hear it open slowly on the otherside, gentle page flipping and huge pauses.  
"I just started.. So it's not quite finished yet" I say quietly into the night, beginning to feel self conscious.  
"Angel of music...Must be Phantom of the opera, correct?"  
"I play trombone in the pit orchestra".  
"Is that why you haven't been sleeping?" I inadvertently touched under my eyes, feeling the soft bags that formed.  
"I'd been preparing for my audition every day after my shift. It's.. Been a few years since I had done a classical piece".  
"What style of music are you more comfortable with?"  
"Jazz mostly. I toured Europe with a big band jazz group during college".  
"Must musicians are decent enough singers, why didn't you audition for a role?"  
"I... Well, I always wanted to be but my little brother was the voice in the family. I just never seemed to reach that level..."  
"Tell me more about your family" he said moving closer to the end of his bed, I could hear the mattress squeak softly.  
"I really shouldn't be telling you this".  
"I see. What can I do to make you more comfortable?"  
"Well it's difficult to get past the serial killer thing, for one and two I know very little about you except for what I've read in newspapers".  
"Well then you can tell me things and I will return the favor. A bit of a quid pro quo if you will. Do you agree? Yes or no?"  
I stopped to think for a second. What could he possibly benefit from knowing my meaningless life details?  
"Yes"  
"Good. Now what was your father like?"  
"Both of my parents are alive and well. My father... He's a local politician, smart man but so down to earth and relatable"  
"Local politician?"  
"Yes, Mayor of my hometown. My turn, do you have any family?"  
"Most died in world war 2 including my parents and sister".  
"I'm so sorry". And I really am, it must have been hard growing up on his own.  
"No need. If singing was your true passion why wouldn't you audition? Maybe it was too easy to fall back on what you already knew".  
"Actually", someone might as well know I guess, "I did, right before my shift. Cast list goes up on Monday, I'm still secured a spot in the pit orchestra if I don't manage to get on the list. Kind of feels nice saying it out loud..."  
"And why is that?"  
"You're the only one I've told. Looks like our time is up, it's my turn next time".  
"I look forward to it".


	4. Tell him nothing

Even though it was almost 3am the nightlife in town was still very much awake. Friday nights it was damn near impossible to find parking near my apartment, I'd end up parking in a parking structure behind the free clinic. It would be a good 10-15 minute walk before I would be safe and warm in my bed. Head down, hands deep in my pockets and walking carefully and quickly.  
When I rounded the corner with the 24 hour pharmacy I felt a strong tug on the hood of my sweater, causing me to lose my balance and fall backwards. My head bounced off the concrete, looking up to see a dark figure looming above me. In my dizzy haze I could see him fumbling for his zipper. With all my strength I kicked him in the ankle knocking him down and giving me a few seconds to try and get up. I barley got up when he pulled me to him and laid a cold blade on my neck.  
"Move and I'll cut you bitch". Reaching up my sweater and ripping the strap in my bra I pull my head forward and slam it back hard. He curses, grabbing a handful of hair pulling my neck back.  
"I warned you". A sharp burning pain grazed up my neck, I could already feel the blood dripping from the wound. While I cried out in pain he shoved his hand down my scrub bottoms. "Maybe I'll cut you some more while I finger fuck your cunt" he growled in my ear. Before he could get too far I grabbed at the knife, rolling to the side trying to pull it from his hand while wildly kicking. He finally let go when I kicked between his legs, limping away from me I screamed fuck you.  
The blood loss was starting to get to me, I tore the sleeve off my hoodie and tied it around my wound. I ran as fast as I could, holding my hand to my neck screaming help. An off duty police officer picked me up and took me to the emergency room.  
My neck wound was severe enough to require stitches. The police officer wrote down my statement as they patched me up. A few minor scrapes here and there and a light crescent moon black eye. Once they finally got to the rape kit I was already 15 minutes late for work. The nurses kept telling me I should go home but that's the last place I want to be. The cop offers to take me back to my apartment to change, I gladly accept taking a moment to call Doctor Chilton and tell him I would be late tonight.  
I took a quick shower and dabbed on some concealer over my black eye. I guess I'll have to wear a turtle neck under my scrubs tonight... I gently pull on my black turtle neck and green scrubs. Reaching for the phone to make the dreaded phone call.  
"Hello? Is doctor Chilton there?"  
"No im sorry, can I take a message?"  
"Yeah um.. Just say that Charlotte will be late tonight but I'm on my way right now".  
"Alright".  
"Thanks". Click.  
Before I can come completely in the door doctor Chilton pulls me into his office. I feel so bruised all over, every pull is agony.  
"I'm sorry doctor Chilton, I had an accident on my way home this morning. Fell down and hit my head pretty good, I just got out of the hospital an hour ago..." I say all a little too quickly, handing him the ER doctors note.  
"You should be a little more careful. this is my direct number next time you have a problem", he hands me his card slightly winking, "please call me".  
"Of course, thank you". Thank goodness he's a moron. I still can't believe he choice such a wildly inappropriate time to flirt with me. I wonder what he would have said if he knew the truth.  
The lights are still on in the hall, I dim them and make my rounds. Everyone is sound asleep except for doctor lecter. I know he's awake, it's just a feeling I have.  
"Good evening doctor"  
"Why so late Ms. Matthews?"  
Barney called my name, two cells over asking me to come to him.  
"I heard what happened, are you okay?" News travels fast... Good to know.  
"Yeah I'm fine. Just a little fall".  
"I could cover for you if you want, you've been up for over 24 hours".  
"No no I'll be, should really try to stay awake anyways because of the concussion. But thank you, really".  
"If you're sure.. I have to go to the pharmacy to pick up some medications for cell block 3. Could you hold down the fort until I get back? I should only be 10 minutes".  
"Definitely, I'll be fine". Once he walked away I went back to doctor Lecter's cell, knowing deep down that he heard every last word.  
"Accident I hear?"  
"Yes, hit my head. I'm fine". I felt my knees weaken, grabbing the wall behind me for balance.  
"Your wound clotted". How could he see it? Is it possible he could... Smell it?  
"Yeah it's just a scratch".  
"Is that why you're wearing that hideous turtleneck? If it really is just a scratch then it should be no issue rolling it down a tad...Although the scent of the disinfectant they globed on it is very strong, must have been pretty deep to require so many stitches". I reached to my neck, the light touch making me gasp in pain. "So, tell me about this little accident".  
I knew there was no lying to him, there was no fooling him... I had to tell the truth but it stuck in my throat. I looked down, feeling embarrassment and fear weld up inside me causing pin pricks of tears.  
"I was walking to my apartment and a man grabbed me from behind..." The words were so hard to say.  
"Did he force himself on you?" He softly asked when I couldn't bring myself to finish my sentence.  
"He tried to".  
"What did he say to you when he began to slit your throat?" I choked down a sob, feeling so sick to my stomach. He had no right to ask me any of this.  
"Maybe I'll cut you some more while I finger fuck your... Cunt" The words came out harsh, wanting to pool down to the floor and cry. I came closer, carefully rolling down my turtleneck and peeling back the bandage that hid the four inch long jagged scar from my ear to the base of my neck. He inhaled deeply through the holes in the glass.  
"When he first touched you, what did you feel?"  
"Shock... And paralyzing fear. I didn't even know what to do. I'd never been touched like that before, it made me feel so disgusted..."  
"Never... Hm, tell me, how old are you?"  
"I'll be 23 in November... Why?"  
"Forgive me but is it safe to presume you are in fact... A virgin?" I swallowed hard, trying to keep down the bile bubbling in my throat.  
"I'm done with this conversation" I say walking back to the office just in time for Barney to return. I let him know that I'm going home and I hail a cab and get the fuck out of there.

God I need some sleep... I re dress my wound. Plopping down on the couch with my copy of the script, humming the music as I read. I find that I can't concentrate, my mind wandering to my earlier conversation with Doctor Lecter...


	5. Show time

Every other day I switched between day and twilight shift. When I arrived at 5am I met the morning shift chief; a short, fat man with a comb over and a mustered stain so stubborn it would never leave his scrub top no matter how many times he washed it.  
"You're assigned to babysit the freaks while they're on the wheel" He said not looking up at me, face glowing from his computer screen.  
"Excuse me?"  
"Jeez I have to explain this to you? All you're doing is watching while they exercise. They go one at a time for half an hour and then back into the cell they go. Got it?" I nodded, still a little unsure what exactly I should be doing.  
"Lecter is already hooked up to the wheel. His 30 minutes start when you get there". One building over is the exercise pen, like a little gym but all there was is a long thick wire on a track. Doctor Lecter waited patiently with his hands folded behind his back.  
"You can start now". My voice sounded ridiculous, soft and meek... It even cracked. Without looking to see if he reacted I go into my designated sitting space. It felt weird to watch someone walk around in circles.  
When I looked up a few minutes later he was just standing there where he began. I stood up and asked if he needed something.  
"Would you like some company?" I asked, hardly believing im saying such a thing. What would we even talk about?  
"I would appreciate that very much". We walked in silence for a moment. I made sure I stayed away from the line, that was certainly one rule I intended to follow to a T.  
"How did you know?" I ask, breaking the silence.  
"Know what exactly?"  
"About me. You know.. Um".  
"Hardly matters how it occurred to me but the real question is why? Surely you've had suitors". I thought carefully about how I wanted to answer, if I even wanted to tell the truth. Although there was no sense in lying to Doctor Lecter, he always saw past it.  
"There have been people I've been interested in, I just don't trust people that deeply. When I was in high school kids just threw sex around like it didn't matter, that it was all meaningless. I couldn't be that way, everything means something. When I was a teenager... I was taken advantage of by a tutor. I think ever since then I've been very cautious of who I put that kind of emotion into". Even thought it had been years since then I still began to tear up. Taking a deep breath I stop walking and smile. "I'm fine though. We.. I mean you, have about 15 more minutes".  
"I would embrace you if you were much closer, but seeing as I'm chained and attached to this ridiculous wire you may have to come to me".

POV: H

I can tell she was caught off guard. The look in her eyes were conflicted, wanting to be held but absolutely terrified.  
"Just a few steps over the line".  
"You must think I'm an idiot..."  
"Afraid are we? Of what my dear, me or possible repercussions?" I chuckled, beginning to walk slowly away.  
"Yes, I am afraid. Can you blame me though? As much of a gentleman you are, it doesn't change the fact you are a murderer. I know what you're capable of".

 

POV: C

I felt terrible for saying no, even though I had every right to. There was no way to put it... I do want to trust him.  
"Despite that..." I say, taking one baby step over the line. "I've actually really enjoyed your company. Is that terrible of me to say?" His lips curled into a slight smile, knowing he got his way. I did what he wanted, just like he knew I would. At the sound of foot steps I back up quickly, realizing what people would thought if I was caught inches away from Hannibal Lecter.  
"I need you to help passing out pills". I turn to look at him one final time and bid him a good morning.

POV: H

One more step and I could have reached out and touched her. Her lavender perfume was intoxicating even when so far from me. Two of the twilight guards came down the hall, stopping at the entrance of the gym, they began to chatter away about the female staff members and the various things they would do to them. What caught my attention, besides the crassness of the subject, was when they mentioned Charlotte.  
"You hear about blonde from night shift? Got a buddy at memorial. He said she was bitching and crying up a storm claiming she had been sexually assaulted. Now ain't that some shit? You've seen her right? Probably was asking for it, she looks like the type. Shy type but you just know she sucks dicks dry for sport".  
"Yeah yeah, she's got that perfect mouth. Fuck I'd give anything to get some of that...". Anger boiling over as they continue to talk about what they would do to her, this would not stand. They both don't deserve to live.  
"Alright, time to unhook the freak".  
"Shh.. Man. You know what he did to Miggs..."  
"Ain't no way he's convincing me to swallow my own tongue or some shit. Let's just do this already". I won't have to convince him, I chuckle silently to myself; ready to attack as soon as I hear the click of the hook.

POV: C

Looking up from my PB&J an alarm rang. Tossing my lunch in the trash the loud speaker echoed, CODE RED IN THE GYMNASIUM. It must have been the patient after Doctor Lecter, it must be.   
By the time ran into the gymnasium I saw the bloody aftermath. An orderly drenched in blood, face barely recognizable and the other being tended to by the on staff nurse.  
"What happened here?" I called out to anyone who would listen to me.  
"Chilton wants to see you in his office. We got things covered here" a nurse shouted over the anguished screams.  
I softly knock on the doorway, grabbing his attention while he fielded call after call. He waved me in and finished his call.  
"Did you see what he did?"  
"Who?"  
"Don't play dumb with me. You know very well whom I'm speaking of. One dead and the other will most likely never be able to see again".  
"Did he say why? Why he did it?"  
"Why? He's a psychopath, he doesn't need a reason. Probably did it to amuse himself, one last bit of fun before he's transferred". I lean forward, this is the first I'm hearing of any transfer.  
"Why is he being transferred?"  
"As a reward for the information he's to provide for an on going FBI investigation. Lucky for you, you won't have to deal with him again. Since we are down another patient, I also won't be needing you for grave yard. Starting next week I'm moving you to the day shift, permanently. Now, I'm very busy, the police will be here any minute. Back to work". He turns away and picks up the phone like he's some hot shot having to fight off everyone's attention. A patient murders one of the staff members and it's just business as usual?  
For the next few hours or so I had a staggered schedule, mostly working in the office or running errands outside the hospital. Agent Starling had come to interview Lecter, that kept him pretty occupied. Tonight I was back to my regular routine cleaning out a nearby cell - the patient was transferred to another facility.  
While putting supplies away in the janitorial closet at the end of the hall the vague shadow in Lecter's cell shifted from the bed to the wall.  
"Why did you kill him?" I inquire to the darkness, not fully expecting an answer.  
"I cannot tolerate rudeness, it disgusts me".  
"Would you kill someone for cutting you off on a freeway? Sure it's not very courteous, annoying of course but it certainly doesn't mean they should have their life taken away". Without thinking I moved closer to the glass than I should. This could be the last time we speak, I won't be intimidated. Out of the dark his face appeared, inches from mine and divided by the glass. I jumped back slightly, needing to catch my breath.  
"Rudeness is an epidemic, my dear". It went quiet, I began to back away but stopped.  
"I suppose this is goodbye" I say, my voice trailing off.  
"Parting is such sweet sorrow".  
"Good luck in Tennessee, Doctor". Walking away felt strange, most interesting part of my would soon be on a plane. Nice little bargaining chip he made...I shake my head, I need to focus. Opening night was so close I could taste it.

I set my alarm, 4 hours should be enough time sleep before the show.


	6. Running around leaving scars

POV: H

Coming back to Baltimore took me out of the way but after much self debate I just couldn't resist. Acquiring a ticket to the opera was easier than I expected, picking up a single ticket left at the call box. Woman behind the counter didn't even ask for any identification.  
The overture began, I suddenly wished I could see the band down there playing but they are safely tucked under the stage. Wonder what shade of blue her eyes would be whilst playing, would they change with the mood of the music?

POV: C

My heart pounded in my chest, I stood being laced in my last corset. This is it, my opening number. What I worked so hard for would be all out there for all to see.  
"Make sure you hit your mark Matthews". I nod, the music began and the curtains opened.

 

POV: H

 

I closed my eyes and took in the music, the voice that filled the room was sweet almost angelic. When I opened my eyes, center stage in a full length white ball gown was a familiar young woman. Just the face I had been waiting to see.

POV: C

"Congrats!" The director said handing me a bouquet of flowers. "You were wonderful". I said my goodbyes and sipped champagne, I couldn't wait to be home in my bed. I had the next few days off, I looked forward to the sleep more than anything.  
When I arrived home my message machine was blinking. I had missed a call from my Mom and Barney, both had requested I call back as soon as possible. Something in Barney's voice made me nervous.

POV: H

Breaking into her apartment was effortless, she should really invest in a good security system. From the living room of her tiny apartment you can see into every room, looking into her bedroom I can see her bed made like she never slept in it before. But the couch in the living room were pushed out, blanket lying on the floor next to the TV remote. Hiding in the laundry the front door unlocks and opens quietly. From the sliver in the door I can see her set down the roses on the counter and then check the machine.  
"You asked me to call back, said it was urgent". Long silence. "What? How's that possible? Oh god... That's horrible... I'm not worried, should I be? No. I'm not. I mean... Why would he come all the way back just to kill me? I'm not worth the trouble.. No I don't need a police escort... No, yes. I'll be fine, yes I'll call tomorrow. Goodbye". She sank down to the couch with the phone limp in her hand. I suppose she knows now about my escape.  
"Fuck..." She shakes her head to snap herself out it and dials another number.  
"Mom? Yeah, sorry for calling back so late I just got in. Yeah I was working, I'm sorry... How was Daniel's recital?" Tsk tsk lying to your mother, but why? "That's great, are you guys heading back tonight or staying for the weekend? Oh ok, great well call me tomorrow. Yeah, okay. I love you". Click.  
*~A week later~*

 

H: 

With ease I lock the apartment door, she would be getting home in a few hours. I had just returned from taking care of some belated business and was curious to see how she was holding up after my escape. By now Chilton's disappearance was front page news, he didn't even deserve the attention.   
I move around the living room, picking up a glass on the table and setting it hesitantly in the sink – I think she would notice if I washed it for her. Best not to leave any trace I was ever here. The couch has been heavily used, a tattered throw blanket thrown over the foot of the sofa. A newspaper laid out, almost in a purposeful way, opened up to a lengthy article about my escape and the capture of Buffalo Bill.   
A key jingled at the front door – hiding in the closet as she came through the door. Arms full of books and a ratty brown messenger bag across her chest, face pink from walking home in the cold. The phone rang startling her as she dropped the stack of books on the kitchen counter.   
“Hello? Oh hey Daniel...” she rolled her eyes, clearly wishing she had let the call go to voice-mail. “You proposed? Oh my gosh Danny, that's amazing! I'm so happy for you. Yeah, I love you too. Give my love to Tina, G'nite”. She stood in silence for a moment, staring at the phone. She didn't have a minute to sit down before another phone call came in, this time she just let it ring.  
“Char? Did you hear Daniel got engaged? I'm sure he's called by now, I know you have mixed feelings about this right now but remember that he's your brother and you need to just be happy for him no matter what. Call me back -” BEEP. She sank down into the bar stool in front of the phone, her face just said it all...  
“Maybe just get off my ass and not worry I'm going to have a fucking melt down whenever someone gets engaged?” She said out loud to herself, standing up and pulling off her bag. “Oh I know, let's treat poor little Charlotte like a child”. She stopped herself, shook her head clearly wanting to say more. Holding things in like that is not good for your health, you should always say what is on your mind.   
She curled up on the couch with her books, pulling a pair of square black framed glasses from the front pocket of her bag. It didn't take long for her fall asleep, halfway sitting up with a book opened in her lap. I emerged as soon as her was out, taking the book gently out of her hand. I make sure I mark her page before setting it down on the coffee table, I catch a glimpse of the cover – the title catches my attention immediately: Hannibal the Cannibal. Looking over the other books they all are books about my crimes. Miss me little one? Or just curious about the monster? I run my fingers down the books on her shelf, silly little girl books... Except one, the only one that looked like it had been read so many times that the spine was cracked; a book I had written a long time ago, before my incarceration. I wonder how long she's had this.   
She let out a soft yawn scooting down until she was laying down on her side, pulling the blanket over her shoulders. Her face looks so pristine, peaceful while asleep; a long lock of blonde hair laid over her neck. I reached out and brushed the strand from her face, from the brief contact I could feel her warmth. The image of her sweet face would make a wonderful addition in my memory palace.

C:  
My alarm blared in the next room, I must have fallen asleep in the living room again... Beaming a shoe at my alarm clock I hopped into the shower. Work had become extremely tedious and quite frankly... boring since the incident in Tennessee. The only upside was that Chilton just up and left after Lecter's escape, the little weasel was terrified. Well maybe if he hadn't been a creepy asshole to everyone, all the time he wouldn't have to worry an escaped serial killer would make a special effort to come after him. Serves him right. I skipped breakfast as usual and bolted out the door, damn Buick was in the shop again so its walking from here on out.

H:  
I would return later to collect my prize once and for all but for now I have work to do...

C:  
"Hey you didn't forget about tonight right?"It really took me a moment to remember what Barney was talking about. Oh... Yes, he set me up with an orderly from graveyard shift - I was so hoping to get out of this.  
"Yeah, of course. Where am I meeting him again?" Dammit I should have come up with an excuse... Anything! Well, too late now.  
"The bar on 3rd, do you need a ride?"  
"Sure, that would be great". I spent the rest of the day kicking myself for not coming up with a reason to blow off this date. Its not that I don't want to date – now just really isn't a good time for me. I'm going to have one drink and get the fuck out of there...  
H:  
My plans were abruptly modified when she came home earlier than expected, she left the apartment in a hurry in a cheap black dress and kitten heels. Outside the window Barney waited in his car, where are you going little one?

C:  
Barney and his girlfriend Annette sat two seats away from me at the bar, I'm keeping my entire focus on the jack and coke in front of me. I've never even met this guy... hopefully he won't even notice me. Half an hour went by, thinking I was safe I finished my drink and began to stand up when I felt a tap on my shoulder.   
“Char, this is Joshua. Charlotte works the day shift at the asylum”. Awkwardly I do a little wave and force a little smile. This cheesy fucker throws a liner at me and I choke out a laugh, 20 minutes and I'm getting out of here...

H:  
As the clock struck 11:30 I began to get impatient, regretting not following her on her date. Outside the door I began to hear muffled voices.  
“Could I come in?” a male voice said, drunk and opptomistic for a hook up.  
“Oh, no I'm sorry I have to work in the morning. I'll give you a call”.  
“Come on baby, live a little”.The door knob turned slowly and stopped.  
“No, really. I have to be up pretty early. Thanks for the drink”. The door pushed open, the male tried once more to convince her and she slammed the door right in his face.   
“Fucking creep...” Setting down her purse by the sink she tilted her head and turned on the sink. Swished water furiously and spitting it back into the sink, hopefully washing away the result of an unwanted kiss. Slightly tipsy she dropped a glass in the sink, reaching for the broken pieces she yelped. Blood running down from the tip of her finger to her palm.

C:  
Wrapping my hand in a towel I flipped through my calender, my new insurance didn't kick in for another month... I can't afford another trip to the ER. Where is my kit...The mixture of alcohol and blood loss began to get to me, unable to stand anymore I plopped on the couch and shut my eyes.

H:  
After she blacked out I redressed her cut and threw her over my shoulder, I would have to wait until we got out of town to properly handle her open wound.


	7. My girl

POV: C

I feel heavy as I sit up. tired and groggy I attempt to reach my face to rub my eyes but my left arm is caught. On what? Looking down, a shiny metal handcuff clamped around my wrist and attached to a bed post. It takes a moment for it to register, I've been drugged and now being held captive. But where? Why?A figure moved in the dark and flicked on the light.  
"Doctor Lecter..."

POV: H

Laying on her side, half way sitting up slightly pulling at her restraints; hair tussled and make up still in tact. She has awoken much quicker than I expected. While unconscious she had a peaceful gracefulness in her face, lips slightly parted almost inviting. Sitting up even more, her eyes began to finally focus on me. Even in the low glow of the light her eyes pierced.  
"Why did you come back?" There have been very few times where I have actually been confused. This was one of those times.  
"Interesting".  
"What?"  
"Not quite the question I was expecting to hear. I'm intrigued".  
"You want me to ask why I'm here? Why me? That's not what I want to know. Why in the world would you come back here when you could go anywhere".  
"I would be very much interested to know your theory".

POV: C

"I would be a lot more comfortable if you took this off" I gestured to the handcuff. I hated the feeling of being trapped, completely unable to defend myself.  
"On one condition".  
"Yes?"  
"Tell me, why do you think I came back?"  
"I... I don't know why. Coming all the way back here just to kidnap me has to mean something but I don't understand why".  
"So you think I'm here for you? Is that it?" He began to move closer to the bed, I hoped he would release the cuff. "Now what was it that you said to Barney on the phone? That you aren't worth the trouble?"  
"I meant... I mean that there's no reason to go out of your way to kill me. First chance at escaping in 8 years there's no way I ever thought you would be back here, it's against your nature".  
"My nature?" He softly hissed, rubbing delicate circles around the keyhole on my cuff.  
"I think of you more like... Like a survivalist. Doing everything and anything to survive. It must have been difficult to adapt after the war, especially for a young child". His hand rose to my neck, thumb under my chin and pointer slightly curled around my jaw and ear.  
"You've done your research. Now, one more thing, why did you lie to your parents?"  
"I didn't want them to have to choose between what event to go to, it made more sense for them to go to my brothers master recital.

 

POV: H

Her pulse fluttered under my thumb, face flush. Curious, she didn't even flinch when I touched her. I slightly dropped my hand down her neck her vocal cords vibrating softly as she began to speak.  
"Why am I here?"  
"All good things come to those who wait... Surely your parents must be worried about your well being, especially about where you work and the company you keep".  
"They... My parents don't know where I work, I told them I worked at a Veterans hospital".  
"Tsk tsk... May I ask why?"  
"I spent a great deal of my life not being able to do anything alone. In result no one ever thought I could actually do anything, that I was in fact useless. Now I have complete control of my life, or at least the parts I'm able to control". For what seemed like eternity we sat in silence.

POV: C

"You gave me your word, I answered you. Now, please, take off this cuff", I finally said breathlessly. My head felt dizzy, I must have been holding my breath. His hand dropped and the cold metal slid off my wrist.  
"There is a shower in the next room with a change of clothes. I took the liberty of getting you a few new things, your sense of style is appalling". Upon standing up I realized I was in my silk night gown, something I rarely ever wore and wasn't completely comfortable in. I gasped and wrapped my arms around myself as a sad little shield.  
"Rest assured, I did not take advantage of you in any way. When you're finished washing up I've prepared dinner" he began to walk away and I had no idea what to say, I wanted to know why I was here. Why was he doing this?  
"Doctor Lecter?" I called after him softly.  
"We'll talk more at dinner. Now, please, feel free to freshen up".

POV C:  
As the door clicked shut I found myself sitting on the bed, confused. Was this some kind of test? To see if I would try and escape. I mean.. That has to be it right? Why else would he have released me from my restraints and left the door unlocked.   
Knowing what kind of harm doctor lecter could inflict, I concluded it was within my best interests to see where this goes and try not to upset him.   
Opening the door to the adjacent room there was a shower. My own toiletries sitting on the counter by the sink and a simple black dress hanging in a garment bag behind the drawer. He wants me to wear this? I suppose I had no real choice. It was either this or continue to wear this night gown.   
POV H:  
While setting the table for dinner I hear quiet steps coming down the hallway. Once the sound reached the top of the stairs I saw her; the dress suited her, hugging her curves in all the right places. She tried desperately not to make any eye contact, head bowed slightly and eyes glued on her 4 inch heels. Once she reached the bottom of the stairs she looked up with her big blue eyes. Brushing a long strand of blonde of hair from her face and tucking it behind her ear.   
POV C:  
"Please, sit" he said, pulling out a chair for me. I smiled politely, trying not to trip wearing these ridiculous heels. Once seated I reached for my cloth napkin, my hand was visibly shaking as I laid it across my lap.   
He placed a plate in front of me, cooked vegetables and a meat that I didn't recognize. Please don't let it be what I think it is...  
"It's veal, you can relax now" I must have been staring too long.   
"I... I'm sorry, i didn't mean to be rude. I'm just feeling dizzy". Still not making eye contact but wanting to keep my composure. He could smell my fear and im sure it pleased him.   
"Now, when you were a teenager a man took advantage of you; what happened next". The question made me even more uncomfortable than I already was.   
"Nothing happened. He did what he did, moved away and I went on with my life. He was never prosecuted". I picked up my fork and poked at a piece of broccoli.   
"Did he force you to preform fellatio? Did he sodomize you?"   
"No.. No he touched me, and tried to have sex with me" I sat the fork back down, suddenly feeling sick to my stomach. I had never talk about this with anyone before...  
POV H:  
From here it was very clear she was holding back tears.   
"Please don't think me cruel, I don't wish to remind you of past hurt. But it's very clear to me that you've never said out loud what happened to you".   
"He took off my pants during a music lesson, tried to penetrate me but he couldn't and later taunted me when my parents came to pick me up. He even told them that I needed to learn how to relax. Is that what you want to hear? How I cried when he tried to force his fingers inside me?" Her face crumbled, beginning to sob into her hands. Now was my chance, no glass  to keep me from touching her.   
POV C:  
I completely fell apart, shaking and crying. I felt sudden warmth, arms being wrapped around me. Looking up from my hands I saw it.. Hannibal lecter was holding me. I wanted to pull away and fight but instead rested my head on his chest. As my tears lessened I began to pull away, realizing the implications of what I've done; crying in front of a murderer.   
"Why am I here?" I asked softly. "If you're going to kill me please just do it..." He chuckled as he straightened out, holding out his hand for me to take.   
"Come with me". Come on suck it up girl... He leads me out to the living room. I set my drink down on the coffee table, sitting on the opposite end of the leather couch. One last attempt.. At least for now, I'm much too buzzed to think of a good plan of escape.  
"My parents are coming into town..."  
"Lying isn't very becoming of you. I'm sure they are much too busy with who was it again? Your brothers engagement? Hmm, must have hit a sore spot".  
"Can we cut the bullshit? Why am I here?" Silence. Ugh... I'm going to die aren't I?  
"I think that's enough for tonight. Come, let's get you to bed".  
"I can manage on my own, thank you" stumbling as I stand up. He shakes his head and takes me by the elbow, leading me up the stairs and back to my room. Sitting on the bed, the strap of my dress drooping down my shoulder.  
"Thank you" I say softly, pulling up the strap. "I'm... So embarrassed".  
"There is another gown in the top drawer, try to get some rest".  
"Aren't you going to put the handcuff back on me?" I ask, half joking.  
"No, I think you know better. Goodnight, little one".  The door shut almost silently, for a fleeting moment I thought of an escape but the combination of exhaustion and not handling alcohol well dragged me to sleep.  
I wake hours later, smelling eggs down stairs. Quickly take a shower, while letting my hair dry naturally I realize I don't have the special concealer I use on my scars. No one has ever seen my forearms without it. Once Doctor Lecter sees them he will humiliate me... Today I will canvas the house, there is a way out. My first thought goes to the phone, one call to 911 and the police would be here in 7 minutes. I slip on my jeans and black tank top, there's no way I'm wearing another dress. I'm much too self conscious.  
Downstairs I catch a glimpse of Doctor Lecter in the kitchen. Do I go for the phone now? In my peripheral vision I see a land line on an end table. Before I can even pick up the phone he calls out from the kitchen.  
"Don't bother with that, the line's been cut. Come sit at the table with me please". I sit across from him at the round table in the kitchen, poking at the omelet on my plate. Once I reached out in front of me to take a sip of water his hand grabbed me by the wrist, forcefully but without causing any pain. His thumb rubbed down the long pink scar on the side of my forearm.  
"Let me see your other hand". I set down the fork and reach out, he turned my arms gently side to side. Inspecting my scars.  
"These are very old, I usually put makeup on them to at least tone it down.." I blurt out, suddenly feeling the need to explain myself.  
"Did you do the ones on your thigh as well?" I feel my face grow hot with the realization that he's seen me practically naked.  
"I thought you didn't touch me". Pulling my arms back to my side.  
"Forgive me, I happen to notice them while dressing you. I assure you nothing unsavory transpired. Is the idea of me seeing you like that so terrible? You're blushing, are you thinking about it now?" I attempted to hide my face, he makes me feel like such a child. The only way to survive this is to be honest, and to give him what he wants.

POV H:  
Her face was a deep shade of red, yes she is definitely thinking about it now. Perhaps next time she'll be a much more willing participate..  
"Yes" she said so quietly that I could barely hear her.  
"I must ask, why do you read all these books about me? When you're curled up on your couch, glasses down to your nose reading your little books... Do you think about the monster or the man?" For a moment I was breathless waiting for her answer.  
"When I was a child, I grew up on fairytales and epic movies about princesses and princes. Do you know who I was more interested in?  The villain. Their characters were always more complex, I wanted to know why they were who they ended up to be. No one changes overnight and all I wanted to know was why. Yes I wanted to figure out what made you well, you. Those few details I was able to get made you feel more real, more human".  
"When did this start?"  
"Right after Doctor Chilton showed me what you had done to that nurse, I made hit the library after work that day. Most books were about the actual crime themselves, that's not what I was interested in. Naively I thought for a moment that I could just ask you but I never thought you would actually speak to me".  
"Let's finish breakfast and go for a walk".  
POV C:  
A walk? I can't outrun him, not my bad knee. Thwarted again. Still feeling a little nauseous from the night before I pick the the eggs and drink all my water. I try to take our plates to the sink to rinse but stops me, saying he'll take care of them while I put on a sweater.  
We walk in silence around the front of the house, there is a lake and a dock.  
"What do you want to know?"  
"I.. Well, one thing I did find is that you lost your family during world war 2. That must have been really traumatic, where did you go after that?"  
"The home I grew up in was turned into an orphanage after the war, it was like I was a prisoner in my own home".  
"How old were you?"  
"10. Another round of quid pro quo?" I nodded.  
"You had a fiance, what happened?" How does he know everything? God.. He must have been in the apartment.  
"He was my high school sweetheart, few years into college he called it off - I guess he thought just medication alone would "cure" my depression. It was stupid, looking back now I'm glad I didn't go through with it".  
"How long were you together?"  
"Hey no, my turn. When did you leave the orphanage?"  
"17, my father's brother and his wife came for me. They took me back to their home in England. Now answer the question".  
"Almost 4 years I believe".  
"And all that time, you never once made love?" I stopped walking for a moment and turned to him.  
"No, it just never felt right to me. Why are you so interested in my sex life?"  
"Curiosity. It's rare to meet a woman your age that has never had sex. You are very different, Carrie".  
"People will wonder where I am, Doctor Lecter..."  
"I don't doubt that. What makes you think I'm keeping you here? You're free to leave anytime but I won't make it easy for you". He said stopping to face towards me, his hands behind his back. "I think you know why you are still here, don't insult me by denying it". Curiosity was about to get the best of me, this could cost me my life.  
"Fine, then let me ask you something; since you are so fascinated by my sex life... Well lack there of. When you were incarcerated did you ever...?" He continued walking, I tailed along side him trying to keep up.  
"Masturbate? Not often. Hiding such private things was a luxury I could not afford. Doctor Chilton wanted to study me, hiding his perverted little cameras away hoping he could catch me in the act. He of course never did, when I did take care of myself I did so very discreetly. Do you want to know if I ever thought of you?" Slightly shocked by the question i decided to ignore it and move on.  
"It must have been very difficult. Going 8 years without sex. I'm sure it's been a relief to be free, somewhat". Could I be more transparent? I practically asked if he's fucked since breaking out of custody...  
"Waiting can be difficult but I'm not a slave to my desires. In case you are wondering, since escaping I still haven't indulged that desire. Does that please you?" I tried so hard not to crack a smile but involuntarily a half smile curled up the side of my face along with a slight blush. "Forgive me, I often say everything that is on my mind. Somehow I don't think you mind, I saw that little smile of yours". He stopped and leaned in really close, baring his teeth as if he would tear the flesh from my face then stopping to smile.  
"That's my girl".


	8. Lie if you must

POV H:  
Even being inches away from her face she didn't flinch, or even blink. Completely trusting I wasn't going to hurt her.

POV C:  
The distance between our lips closed, I felt his lips rest onto mine with a surprising gentleness. When he pulled away I was stunned silent...  
"I...I didn't expect that". What do I mean to him? If anything at all. The worst part is that I don't even know how to ask.  
"Tell me what you're thinking right now".  
"I'm trying to figure what all this means... Why I'm here, why you kissed me". He asked me to come back inside.  
"I would like you to join me for dinner, if you're feeling up to it". He finally said, breaking the silence.  
"Of course", I started to walk up stairs and then i stopped.  
"Something you want to add darling?"  
"You have very soft lips..."

 

 

POV H:  
While preparing the appetizers I heard the stairs creak, very slippery of you Charlotte... A few moments later I hear music coming from the living room. Time to see what she is up to.  
Before I reach the living room I can already smell her lavender perfume. I see her, hunched slightly over the piano playing a soft melody.  
"Did you need some help in the kitchen?" She asked, not looking up from her fingers.  
"I'm nearly finished. What are you playing?"  
"Once Upon A December. I auditioned with this piece". Standing directly behind her, so close that I can feel the heat radiating off her skin.  
"Would you sing for me?" She stopped playing for a moment and closed her eyes as I brushed her hair over her soft, bare shoulder.  
"Nervous?" She kept her eyes closed and sang softly over the melody she played. Still so shy and sweet.

POV C:  
I needed a minute to gather all my courage, it was one thing to sing in front of an audience. A nameless, faceless audience but it was another thing to sing in front of a man like Hannibal Lecter. The fear of embarrassing myself was overwhelming, I tried not to think about him in the opera box watching me sing on opening night. The only soul that really knew me. How could I not feel his eyes burn on my skin?  
When I finished the piece there was a pregnant silence and then a warm rough hand sliding up my arm. I needed to keep my eyes closed. I can't let him see me crumble in his fingers. His hand rested openly around my neck now, I should be terrified. A serial killer, a cannibalistic serial killer has his hand around my neck. He could kill me and it would be so easy for him, the question really is; will he or when will he?  
"Doctor lecter?" I finally whispered. He could see the wheels turning in my head.  
"Does this bother you? Being so close, so vulnerable? I could really hurt you" he whispered roughly into my ear, leaning down and keeping his hand fixed to the front of my neck. A long finger stroking the healed scar down my throat.  
"If you wanted to hurt me you would have done it already, I can't stop you and I won't beg for my life. Spare us both the embarrassment.." He chuckled, his hand slipping away. Did he want to test me? Frighten me? Maybe a little bit of both. Either way, maybe I'm safe for now.  
"Dinner is ready".  
Once again I'm sitting directly across from him, poking at some meat. I know I need to eat eventually but I really hate having to eat in front of him... Maybe it would help if we talked.  
"Quid pro quo, yes or no?" I asked, turning the tables on him.  
"Absolutely, as I recall it was my turn. Did you ever tell anyone about what your tutor did? Your parents maybe?"  
"I did tell my mom, she wanted to call the police but at the time I was so blind; thinking he was in love with me that I begged her not to, I was afraid his career would be ruined. I did come to regret my decision".  
"Am I free to go anytime I want?" I ask, skipping over my glass of wine to get to the water.  
"I'm not going to stop you. The only one keeping you here is yourself, ask yourself why. Since then has he contacted you?"  
"I went to see him after I turned 18".  
"Why would you put yourself in that situation?"  
"I needed some closure. Even if he told me I was just an opportunity, some 15 year old pussy to pass the time, I just needed to hear it. Out loud for once".  
"And?"  
"He just wanted to talk about how much I was the same... That it was great I was older now and then he kissed me. It took me right back to the back of that white Torus on Christmas Eve, a horrible and uncomfortable kiss. He didn't stop calling me after I left, he wanted to know where we stood. Where we stood? Where we fucking stood? God he was pathetic, a pathetic asshole who had the nerve to ask if I finally popped my cherry.." I have to stop... Stay on point. "Um, anyways".  
"I could take care of it for you". I've heard this before but this was no joke, I knew he absolutely would.  
"My turn, what do you want with me?" His face grew impatient, even angry.  
"Now, you know. You aren't that dense. The feelings are mutual, don't insult me by denying it".  
"Maybe. Maybe I do have... Some feelings. Do you want me?"  
"Tsk tsk, my turn little one. Does the idea of being intimate frighten you?"  
"Yes, it does. I think you mean, does the idea of making love with you.. Frighten me. A little but not in the way it should". He sat his fork down and leaned in on the table. Suddenly I felt miles away even being directly across from him.  
"Now we're getting somewhere. First, to answer your question, I do want you and second is it because of who I am? Afraid I'll hurt you on purpose? Maybe bend you over, hold you down and take what I want from you? Is that it?"  
"No" I croaked, cutting him off. "You wouldn't do that...". This time, he stood up and walked around me stopping directly behind me once more.  
"I wouldn't?" I shook my head.  
"Use your words Charlotte. Would I?"  
"No". He pushed my chin up, tilted towards him.  
"Look at me". I opened my eyes, his face was hard to read since I was looking at him upside down. "You're right, I wouldn't. I have no interest in taking anything you aren't willing to give".  
"Is that what you're waiting for? For me to submit?" He let go of my chin and sat back down. I couldn't look at him.  
"I don't need your submission. I'm waiting for you to be ready for me".  
"When will you know?" He smiled and reached for his glass of wine.  
"First step is admitting it. It's one to say it in your head, think about it... Long for it but it's another to say it out loud. That sets it all in concrete". He excused himself and went to bed.  
I laid in bed thinking about everything he had said. Am I holding back? Well... Of course I am. He's a murderer. Not exactly someone you bring home to meet your folks but, I can't lie about what I'm feeling right now.


End file.
